I'm a Who, not a What

If I told you I was a 19 year old, female college student, what would you assume about me?

What if I said my parents were from Ghana? Or Guatemala?

What would you think if I said my parents came from Pakistan?

If I were a Christian, how would you view me?

How about a Muslim?

An Agnostic, or an Atheist?

Would the things you believe about me make you want to stop reading now?

What if I claimed to be a 43 year old single mom with four kids living on welfare, what would you think about me then? Did you think that I was milking the government? Or did you take the time to hear my story and realize that I work two jobs, but it still isn’t enough because my ex-husband hasn’t paid child support in twelve years?

If I were a 57 year old man, huddled under a bridge in dirty clothes and matted hair, what would come to mind? Am I just too lazy to get a job, or just a crazy old man? Perhaps you took a moment out of your day to listen and you learned that when I lost my job several years back, I also lost my health care. Yes, I have mental and emotional issues, but the medication is expensive and I have no place to go.

Do you have a few bucks so I can buy a sandwich?

How much do you really know about the people around you? How often have you taken a step outside of your group of friends, your church group, or your co-workers and talked to the lady that clean the men’s room?

That pair of hurting eyes that watch you every morning from the street corner as you drive by...there is a person under that dirt and he could use some kindness.

In our safe little cocoon where we go from house to car to work, we have lost a little bit of our humanity. We communicate via the internet and keep our Friends List limited to the people who are like us. We close ourselves off from the rest of the world and dismiss people based on their labels, because it is the easy way; the safe way to live.

It can be a daily struggle for me to remember that that no matter how much stuff I have to get done, the people are always more important. The minute I prioritize things to-do over people, I've lost one of the best parts of myself.

The truth is that I’m not a 19 year old co-ed. I’m not a 43 year old mom, or a 57 year old homeless man. I’m a 42 year old wife, student, and an aunt. I’m a writer, a Christian, a Quaker, and loyal friend.

I’m a woman that prays desperately every night that her young nephew will survive another day in Afghanistan where people are shooting at him as he risks his life to tend to the wounds of his fellow soldiers.

I’m a graduate student praising God that she has the opportunity to continue her academic career at one of the top universities in the nation...so that someday, she can make a difference in the lives of women and children living in poverty.

I’m a wife that cooks and cleans during the day, and at night pours out her thoughts and emotions into a little blog, hoping that her words will touch the heart of someone and begin a positive change in the world.

No matter what label I wear be it wife, student or aunt, it will never truly define me. To know me, to really know me, you have to stop for a moment and let me into your world. You have to open your heart and listen to me, share with me and smile with me.

~ESW