H8TE

John 3:16 says, "God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life."

See where it says, "the WORLD"? It means the whole world and everyone in it. God loves us all equally and His love is offered for everyone...not just the white, middle-class, straights with 2.5 kids, a dog named Fluffy and an SUV. Everyone, no exceptions.

So where is the love?

I bring this up because the ongoing argument about gay marriage has devolved into a hate-filled, cruel and mean-spirited fight seeking to disenfranchise an entire group of people. Those who are leading the charge against them include many who call themselves Christians. This saddens me greatly. I hold no shame in saying that I'm a believer in Christ and that belief brings me an extraordinary amount of joy and peace, but I am ashamed of some of the actions undertaken by people who claim to share my faith.

The whole issue just breaks my heart.

In no way do I want to tell people what to do, think, or believe...that's not my purpose here. What I want to do is explain my view...why I do not support these propositions, and why I think those who follow Christ would better serve Him by focusing on loving people rather than on alienating them and treating them like second-class citizens. When did a gay person stop being a part of the whole "world" thing we discussed earlier? Are my gay friends less important and less-deserving of their constitutional freedoms then my straight friends? Should they not be able to pledge themselves to the person they love and appreciate the privileges that accompany that?

Do not tell me that a man has any less right to visit his lifelong partner in the hospital than I do, simply because of our genders. How can we deny such basic human rights?

California's Proposition 8, along with Florida's Prop 2, sought to limit the legal definition of marriage to one man and one women. What bothers me here is that we basically asked the government to define a private relationship. A marriage is a contract between two people...two adults capable of making their own decisions. Why do we want the government involved? It's a personal relationship.

If marriage is based on a religious and/or a personal idea of commitment, then no governmental agency should be allowed to step in and decide how it should be defined. Ensuring the people entering this private contract are adults and maintaining the necessary statistics and such...sure, that's what we need civil authorities for...but stay out of our private lives and our personal beliefs.

Some of the proponents of these laws claim that the original definition of marriage was between a man and a women, and should continue to be defined as such. I understand that. If one group's religious doctrine states that only a boy and a girl can wed....then no one should be able to tell them otherwise, nor force their leaders to perform any weddings that go against what their religion or philosophy prescribes. The government, and everyone else, should respect religious doctrines and butt out...it doesn't concern you.

If another religion decides that two consenting adults of any gender can make a lifelong commitment, that's their choice. Leave them be and stop being so demeaning to people who do not think like you.

The freedom to practice religion means that people don't have to worship in such a way that goes against their beliefs. How is that so difficult to understand?

One religious ideology should not be able to define how the rest of the nation is run. I do not want another person's set of beliefs to be forced upon me...and I have no right to force my faith upon anyone else. Period.

What really upsets me...more than the politics and the fights over ideologies, is the amount of money wasted on this topic. Some reports state that over $80 million was spent on California's prop alone, with $39.9 million of that spent by those wanting to pass the amendment.

Nearly $40 million. Christ spoke about love, about caring for each other and sharing His grace with the world. How can we honestly say that millions of dollars spent on such a hateful campaign shows any kind of love and compassion to others?

Some statistics show that nearly 15 million children globally die of starvation every year. Statistics in the US are pretty scary as well. $40 million would have gone a long way to serve these innocent lives.

There is a disheartening news story about an elderly man who died of hypothermia in his own home in Michigan in 2009. Where were the Christians? Where were his neighbors? How could this man, a veteran of a WWII, have died alone and freezing in his own home...in our civilized and much blessed nation?

I don't know how this fight will end. Either way there will be broken hearts and a lot of upset people...but my commitment remains to Christ and showing His love and grace to the world...even if it means that I will anger and alienate a lot of the people who claim to share my faith.

Labels Schmabels

I am fairly laid back and like let people find their own groove in life. As long as they don't interfere with my groove, everything is cool. But the one thing that that annoys me to no end...something that lessens the quality of all of our lives, is relying upon labels in order to understand others.

It can be insulting, rude, and ignorance is never a good thing. Ever.

I'm not saying we shouldn't identify people according to some agreed upon standard. That would be silly. Labels in general help us communicate and to manage the chaos. Knowing what a person does for a living, what their political leanings are, or getting their view of religion can communicate volumes....but we can't stop there.

Our culture is getting lazy and we tend to just slap a label on the forehead of a person and place them in a box thinking we totally get them. People think they know me, but I have to wonder if they really do. How many of the so-called "friends" in our lives have taken the time to truly understand who we are...not according to their own opinions and expectations, but from our perspective?

I cannot tell you how many times I've had people assume things about me that leave me baffled. No, I don't correct them any more...if they really cared, they would take the time to find the truth. I'm so not wasting the energy on them if they aren't willing to expend any energy on me.

Because I'm a Christian people assume that I love James Dobson, I'm a right-wing fanatic, I hate gays, and that science scares me. This happens so often now that I have learned to just shake my head laugh to myself.

Because I am a perpetual jokester some people think I must not be very bright and never take anything seriously. Whatever.

And one of my all time faves: because I am so laid back, I need guidance on how I should run my life. Puhlease!

The list goes on and on...and on.

I'm guilty of judging the book by its cover too, and I'm the first to admit it. When I met my husband he was the biggest nerd I had ever seen (Okay, he still is...). He thinks calculus is relaxing, that gadgets are the epitome of cool, and studied chemical physics because it was interesting.

Naturally, I thought he'd have no interest in a social science major who loves art and has a shoe addiction. He was a nerd and I didn't even know what the square root of Pi was (nor did I care). But I was incorrect. There is so much more to him than his love of science and other brainiac endeavors. Taking the time to get to know him has been one of the smartest things I've ever done.

It all worked out for the best with my husband, but now I try very hard to look past what people are and try to see who they are.

It would be way cool if people would do the same for me and everyone else out there.

Thanks.